This was written on paper the other day for Ricks request for notes on our daily practice. I have been quite busy so i finally am able to get this on the computer.
The other day, i was at work and was practicing some things from Wujifa class. Specifically i was focusing on feeling peng jin while doing various tasks such as carrying ladders and equipment around the job. He showed me a few things, such as using expansion to lift objects instead of contraction. I was beginning to get a good feeling for it as the week progressed when i saw someone walking close by that had a very sunken chest, and the head was quite forward and out of alignment. When i saw him i noticed a feeling of arrogance inside of myself. I felt compassion for him, and noticed that my chest was held up. This led to the feeling of peng jin which remained but was relaxed, full and open; a contentment that included all things, and was able to.
The interesting thing was that i noticed the initial intention was blind. It was unchecked by awareness of my surroundings. For something to remain true to itself it is in rapport with its environment; kind of like sympathetic resonance. When we go inside of ourselves with the intention of developing, as opposed to noticing, we may be easily misguided by blind drive for our desired outcome. That is why i see the extreme importance of differentiating between desire and necessity. Desire is simply a matter of putting the cart in front of the horse. Necessity is like the hand being burned by fire, there is no choice, you dont need to strive to take the hand away, and there is no imitation. Only the confused mind chooses, only the confused mind desires, which is really accumulation. Now, when looking back at the simple and practical situation such as the one stated above, one can say that the desire for peng jin was leading my intention as opposed to an open awareness of the state of the body and the environment and even the activity of the mind. The latter is born of necessity, as a result of the mind being passively aware, sensitive. There is no strife in necessity, there is freedom. Strife is born of desire. The confused mind chooses.
This is what i have learned...